Finally

 To sum up my kung fu in this year I can sum it 

That first sentence I wrote back in July and I think that it sums up my kung fu year quite nicely, I can sum it up to .... blank. Tonight was the first night that I got down an did my push ups and sit ups in about 3 months, 

I am just going to verbal diarrhea this blog, So i know that I have been going through a rough time as of late with well everything. it is not just work but at home I have been feeling a sort of hopeless ness with knowing that I keep having less and less time with my family and that Mac is growing up so fast and I don't wanna lose that

I am disappointed in myself with my kung fu. The way of mastery seems so far and unattainable this year due to the constant change. I know that as humans we are supposed to adapt to change rather well but all I have gotten from this constant year of change and stress is an ulcer, 

And I know that if I get off work at 7 pm I could have time to get to kung fu but it is crappy that I have decided that it is not a priority this year, but that seems to be the cycle. The dedication that I would like to put into Kung Fu is not equivalent  to what I really do. I have watched most of the classes this year and though I don't get off in time for I Ho Chuan or kung fu some nights I have resources that I could use, 

Covid classes, sifu's and an entire network for people going through this kung fu journey with me. Its just so easy and simple to get wrapped up in "woe is me, I'm so tired" and neglect everything and everyone that tries to help

so to everybody in I ho CHuan I apologies for dragging my feet this year. I know that writing this blog and trying to get my ducks in a row is not going to fix things overnight, but hopefully it is a start, 

thanks