Sick of it

So this past week my family and I were suck with the stomach flu that has been passing itself around. Not covid thankfully but still scary because this was the first serious illness that Mac has gotten. I was calling 811 daily and I took her to the hospital. Nothing was too serious but the doctor was friendly and was reassuring that it was okay to bring her in. I know that I'm lucky that is was only a stomach bug but man it was scary. I was sick as well and not being able to keep up with baby and then having to go somewhere while sick really took a lot out of me. And it's time like this when I think, or I should more accurately say think after the fact, that I do a lot. And it never seems that way at the time until I cannot do it. I wasn't able to walk my baby without getting super nauseated.  I wasn't able to keep anything down and thus the cooking ceased and crackers and toast were made. Even my Kung fu which I have been slacking on I was missing. I wasn't able to make it on Wednesday last class due to the flu. But I digress.

I really like doing the things I do daily and I want to continue to be able to do them. It was such a relief yesterday when I no longer felt like I was going to yarf up my breakfast and then finally last night the exhaustion went away. I went to class last evening online, I really don't want anyone else catching this bug! 

I guess what I was trying to get across is even if I'm hard on myself most days for not doing things I used to, I gotta remember that I am still making a difference  and doing the best I can. 

Have a goodnight everyone!

Listening

I listen to many things during the day. Music, my husband, the dishwasher and Mackenzie with her happy babbling and incessant demands. I listen to friends family and the occasional stranger who needs and ear and a good chat. I listen to the breeze and the running water as the snow melts and it gets warmer. It is a very rare occasion though, that I will listen to myself. 

The first example would be when it comes to my limitations in what I am able to do in a day. Logically I tell myself that I need to get certain things done in a day. I know that I am taking care of a baby and I am getting better at adjusting my day around her and getting chores and hobbies done. But there are still days when I get overwhelmed because I feel like I have too much on my plate and I still feel like I should be adding on. Because that is what I used to do. It is what I would like to do again.

Another example is when it comes to my Kung Fu mentality specifically blogging. I talk myself up and i run concepts that I would like to blog about but by the time I feel like I have time to write, the motivation is gone and I feel like the concepts I came up with are not worth the blog. I know thats not true but I also listen to that little insidious voice sometimes as well. 

Anyway I'll wrap this up by saying that I need to listen better to the positive rather than the negative!